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How can I be supported?

In an emergency, call 999 and ask for the police. If you cannot speak, press 55 when you are prompted and your call will be transferred to the police.

What is Domestic Abuse?

Does your partner, ex-partner or someone you live with:

  • cut you off from family and friends and intentionally isolate you?
  • bully, threaten, or control you?
  • take control of your finances?
  • monitor or limit your use of technology?
  • physically and/or sexually abuse you?

Domestic abuse is not always physical violence. It can also include:

Anyone can be a victim of domestic abuse, regardless of gender, age, ethnicity, religion, socio-economic status, sexuality or background.

Domestic abuse includes any behaviour of one person towards another if they are personally connected, each are aged 16 or over, and the behaviour is abusive, including physical or sexual abuse, violent or threatening behaviour, controlling or coercive behaviour, economic abuse, and psychological, emotional or other abuse. It can be a single incident or a pattern of behaviours. Domestic abuse can impact someone from any age – including older people, and it can also include violence from children to parents across the life course. This can include:

  • Child-to-parent violence
  • Adolescent-to-parent violence
  • Adult child to parent violence
  • Parental elder abuse
  • Matricide, patricide, or parricide.

If you are a parent of a child or young person and experiencing domestic abuse, please contact our Early Help Team, who are based in children’s centres across Bury. The Early Help team also run a number of drop-ins locally from their centres for all families - details of these can be found on the website.

More nationally, PEGS is a social enterprise set up to support parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (including those with adult children). For more information, visit the PEGS website.

Remember - Domestic Abuse can take many forms, including coercive control, and does not need to include physical abuse. If you are under 16 years of age, please visit the I am a child or a young person subsection of our Domestic Abuse page for specific advice and guidance.

Bury’s local Domestic Abuse Services are provided by Safenet. Safenet provides support for anyone experiencing Domestic Abuse or worried for someone experiencing domestic abuse.

You can call their advice line on 0300 3033 581. This advice line is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

You can also e-mail the team at daoutreachbury@safenet.org.uk or use Safenet’s Live Chat function on their website 7 days a week during three dedicated timeslots. For more information, please visit the Safenet website directly. 

Other ways of accessing support

There are many ways to access support.

In a non-emergency, you can report Domestic Abuse incidents online. Greater Manchester Police also have a specialist department with trained domestic violence and abuse officers who can help. They can be contacted on 0161 856 8064.

There are many charities and support services for Domestic Abuse locally, regionally, and nationally. A list of many of these can be found on the GMP website. You can also find a list of local support services on the Bury Directory.

Accessing Emergency Accommodation

Bury Council has a duty under Part 4 of the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 to provide accommodation-based domestic abuse support, also known as safe accommodation.

If you are fleeing domestic abuse and need emergency temporary accommodation, we can support you to find accommodation appropriate to your needs. This could include the following:

Plan how to stay safe

Making a safety plan will help you to feel more in control of the situation and give you the confidence to take action to protect yourself and your children.

Here are some tips to help you draw up a plan of action for your safety:

  • Keep a diary of domestic violence and abuse incidents
  • Know where you can quickly and easily access a phone
  • Keep a list of emergency contact numbers with you, including friends, relatives and the police
  • Keep some money aside for emergency bus, train, cab fares or food and accommodation costs
  • Have an extra set of keys for the house, flat or car
  • Keep keys, money and a set of clothes for you and your children packed ready in a bag and leave it with a friend or relative you can trust.

Find out about local support services.

If you are planning to leave, try to:

  • Leave when you are sure that the perpetrator is not around
  • Take all of your children with you
  • Take legal and financial papers, marriage and birth certificates, court orders, NHS cards, passport, driving licence, child credit books, address book, bank books, chequebooks, credit cards etc.
  • Take a few personal possessions which have sentimental value
  • Take favourite toys for the children
  • Take clothing for several days
  • Take any medicines you or your children might need.

Remember...

  • You have the right to live a life free from violence and fear.
  • You are not alone: Research shows that as many as one in ten women are in an abusive relationship. It happens to women of all ages, classes, races, and religions.
  • You are not to blame: Your partner or the perpetrator has choices about the way they behave.
  • You can't change your partner's behaviour: The only way for the perpetrator to change is for them to realise that they have a problem and seek help.
  • You are in danger if you ignore the violence: The violence tends to get worse the longer it goes on.
  • Break the silence - do not remain isolated: Get help from someone you trust, or you can contact one of the organisations that offer specialist information and support.
  • The impact on children: The impact of domestic violence and abuse on children can be similar to the effect of any other abuse or trauma.
  • There is life after an abusive relationship: Many people discover they enjoy living without a partner and others form new and loving relationships that they never believed were possible when they were with their violent partner.