Being in a relationship - whether it’s your first or something more serious - should never make you feel scared, ashamed, or controlled. If someone you're dating or close to is hurting you emotionally, physically, or making you feel unsafe in any way, it’s not your fault. Abuse can be hard to spot, especially when feelings are confusing or intense. But help is here, and you don’t have to go through it alone.
Abuse doesn’t always leave bruises. It can come in many forms, like:
- Emotional abuse: they put you down, call you names, or make you feel worthless.
- Controlling behaviour: They stop you from seeing friends or checking your phone.
- Threats or fear: they shout, scare you, or threaten to hurt themselves if you don’t do what they want.
- Physical violence: they hit, push, grab, or hurt you in any way.
- Sexual pressure: they touch you when you’ve said no, or guilt you into doing things you’re not comfortable with.
- Online control: they demand your passwords, monitor your messages, or spread things about you online and/or on social media.
If any of this sounds familiar, know this: there is help out there, and you are not alone.
Many young people in abusive relationships feel confused or blame themselves.
You're not alone, and there are things you can do to get help:
- Talk to someone you trust: a friend, family member, teacher, or school counsellor can be a good first step.
- Reach out for help: there are people trained to support young people in your situation. For example, you can contact Childline online or phone them at 0800 1111.
- Make a safety plan: if you're scared, think about safe places you can go, people you can call, and important things to take if you ever need to leave quickly.
- If you are in immediate danger, call 999.
Breaking up with someone who is abusive can feel overwhelming, especially if you're scared of what they’ll do, or if they’ve isolated you from others. That doesn’t mean you’re trapped. Support is available to help you plan safely, whether you want to leave now or just talk things through. For local support within Bury, you can call Safenet Bury at 0300 3033 581 at any time, or visit the Safenet website. They have a confidential live chat function on their website 7 days a week.